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10-13-2017, 03:46 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,067
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How many times have you thought "I should give old ....... a call"
And you never do, and it is too late?
I have 1 left of 11 Aunts and Uncles on Dad's side.
My Uncle Brookes from Parksville has joined the rest.
Time to make some phone calls, and do some visiting before it is too late.
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Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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10-13-2017, 04:44 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Sherwood Park Ab
Posts: 6,324
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ken07AOVette
And you never do, and it is too late?
I have 1 left of 11 Aunts and Uncles on Dad's side.
My Uncle Brookes from Parksville has joined the rest.
Time to make some phone calls, and do some visiting before it is too late.
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I agree...
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An awful lot of big game was killed with the .30-06 including the big bears before everyone became affluent enough to own a rifle for every species of game they might hunt.
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10-13-2017, 04:47 PM
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Banned
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Kimberley B.C.
Posts: 5,234
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Yeah, thought about calling some old buddies but when I did they had passed.
Why don`t they call me?
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10-13-2017, 04:58 PM
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Banned
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 2,485
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fisherpeak
Yeah, thought about calling some old buddies but when I did they had passed. Why don't they call me?
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Let me guess,,, cause they're dead?
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10-13-2017, 05:17 PM
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Calgary
Posts: 7,544
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That's really good advise. People don't even have to older to keep in touch with them, life is uncertain. I'm "only" 51, but a few of my friends have already passed away from accidents. It's good to let people you care about know that.
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10-13-2017, 05:43 PM
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Gone Hunting
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Between Bodo and a hard place
Posts: 20,168
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I agree. A lot of folks rag on about FB, but I've found some friends on there I hadn't seen in years.
In one case I found a guy I was in the RCAF with 50 years ago. We had a chance to visit for nearly 3 years until he passed.
I'm lucky enough to have my mother still alive. She's 92 and on her own. still sharp and independent. We visit on the phone every few days.
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I'm not lying!!! You are just experiencing it differently.
It isn't a question of who will allow me, but who will stop me.. Ayn Rand
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10-13-2017, 05:56 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: East Central Alberta
Posts: 8,315
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Worked on a farm west of Innisfail for two summers when I was 15/16. John/Anne Duncan who were recently married and in their mid thirties. Of course living with them as a hired hand they were like my away-from-home parents. Stopped to visit them about ten years ago and let things slide until this past summer. Both had died. Wish I had a do over.
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Old Guys Rule
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10-13-2017, 06:30 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 2,955
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I encourage people to go visit a long term care facility even if you have no relative or friends in there. I call the patients the forgotten people as you do not see many visitors there.
As my mom has been in a care facility I have taken to talking to lots of the patients who just want someone to talk to. One person told me they can not go there as the people stare at you. I tell them to wave or say hello and then it is no longer a stare and it will help break up a long day for the patients.
If you feel uncomfortable about going to visit a facility then go to the nursing station and say you want to volunteer to read or talk to a patient.
It is tough to do but very worthwhile.
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10-14-2017, 09:23 AM
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Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 1,463
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You know your getting old when you keep track of your friends by reading the obituary columns. One must continually cultivate new friendships, as loneliness is a fear of many aged.
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10-14-2017, 09:33 AM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 2,955
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MyAlberta
You know your getting old when you keep track of your friends by reading the obituary columns. One must continually cultivate new friendships, as loneliness is a fear of many aged.
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That is a good point because as you grow older something happens to some of us and we get mad at our friends easily. You wonder why you never hear form old Joe any more and think back maybe it is because I told him not to touch anything in my shop. Joe would have never wrecked anything just me being an ass. I have another old friend who always wants to do the talking and thinks I have nothing else to do but listen. He keeps saying it is his call, his nickle so he gets to do all the talking. I try really hard not to treat my friends like it is my nickle. Look after your friends.
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10-14-2017, 09:46 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: AlbertaSask
Posts: 4,217
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This thread is one we could all learn from...all of us are guilty of not staying in touch as much as we get older..life seemes to have sped up and we are finding less and less time to spend with those we truly care about...family and friends alike...I would write more but I think I had best go pick up the phone, I got some calling to do...
Zip
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"Never be ashamed of scars it just simply means that you were stronger than what tried to hurt you"
"Good judgement comes from experience, and experience...well,That comes from poor Judgement"
"KEEP SMILING"
Zip
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10-14-2017, 02:21 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,067
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I always think of it the day I hear of someone else dying. My Uncle Brookes will be buried next week, and I have not talked to him in 2 years.
And today I found out that another very nice man I knew passed, 32 years of age in Lloydminster. He just was offered a great job, was moving back to Camrose to be with family again, extremely excited about $30 per hour and back at home. They found him in the elevator of his apartment.
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Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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10-14-2017, 02:54 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 8,549
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Thanks for posting this topic Ken!!
I have several uncles and aunts left but they're all getting on most in their late '70's and mid to late '80's. Haven't spoke to many in years. My dad passed almost 8 years ago and mom 1.5 years ago. Said very little to any of them at the funerals.
Your thread has caused me to get off my ass and call some of them up. Next weekend instead of hunting I'm making the 800 km round trip and going to visit as many as I can. I still have 3 uncles and aunts on my dads side and 6 uncles and 8 aunts on my moms. Time to bury some hatchets and make amends.
It sure was nice connecting to them over the phone and seeing them will be a cosmi event. I can't wait to hit the road Friday evening.
Thanks Ken
BW
Last edited by Bigwoodsman; 10-14-2017 at 03:00 PM.
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10-14-2017, 03:00 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,067
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bigwoodsman
Thanks for posting this topic Ken!!
I have several uncles and aunts left but they're all getting on most in their late '70's and mid to late '80's. Haven't spoke to many in years. My dad passed almost 8 years ago and mom 1.5 years ago. Said very little to any of them at the funerals.
Your thread has caused me to get off my ass and call some of them up. Next weekend instead of hunting I'm making the 800 km round trip and going to visit as many as I can. I still have 3 uncles and aunts on my dads side and 6 uncles and 8 aunts on my moms. Time to bury some hatchets and make amends.
It sure was nice connecting to them over the phone and seeing them will be a great event.
Thanks Ken
BW
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You brought a tear to my eye. You have a great trip, be safe.
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Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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10-14-2017, 03:05 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 957
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Great advice Ken. Thanks.
I just contacted a good friend and old work buddy I lost touch with.
I don't know who was more shocked, him or me when he answered the phone, haha.
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10-15-2017, 12:02 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Alberta
Posts: 560
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You are 100% correct Ken! Make those calls while you still can and they can still hear you. I would rather spend $50.00 on phone calls to my longest bestest gal friend in the USA then I would on clothing or anything else wimmen get.................. She is a jewel and has been in my life since I was 14 and I draw my US Social Security now so you know it has been a longggggggggggg friendship. But calling those folks you only see once in a while or family you see only every few years IS very important to YOU and to THEM so come off those pennies and make those calls BEFORE you can no longer get an answer from them............................
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10-23-2017, 10:27 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,067
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Has anyone given old ......... a call?
__________________
Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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10-23-2017, 10:29 AM
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Blackfalds
Posts: 6,968
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my grandpa was doing great for a long time, then recently it all went downhill fast.
now he's in the hospital waiting for a long term bed. brain tumor (not cancer) is causing seizures. no surgery options due to his age.
now everytime im back in calgary i go see him. try to get as much time with him as i can.
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Trudeau and Biden sit to pee
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10-23-2017, 11:48 AM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 1,685
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A kid I grew up with and I had a falling out in our early 20’s (we were darn good pals before that).
When I was around 28 he left a message on my phone that he was in town and wanted to get together to bury the hatchet.
I thought to myself “p*** on him” and never called him back.
Three months later he died of a “lifestyle related incident”.
It still bugs me today (20 yrs later) that I should have called him back, and maybe things would have turned out a bit different.
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10-23-2017, 11:59 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,067
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Sorry Honker.
That's rough.
Can't think that way, the old butterfly flapping it's wings in Japan....
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Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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10-23-2017, 01:53 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 9,813
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I try to keep in touch with family by visits, FB and emails to the eastern Uncle. But some chose to be loners to no fault of ours. But it is a good reminder Ken, that we shouldn't wait for tomorrow.
A real good friend passed in July of Lung cancer, we all knew it was coming. I spent a ton of time with him from his diagnosis till the last hours of his life. No regrets for me, made some excellent memories. But he and his family were dis jointed, it was heart breaking to hear his brother(one who he didn't talk too) speak at his funeral of how their differences were petty, what a great childhood and young adult life they had and now he is gone. Both hard heads could have made an effort to reconcile before his death, neither did. Both had big issues going on, cancer for my friend, his brother lost a teenage age son. Couldn't find a way to forgive their issues before one left. That's life sometimes.
Now take Ken's lead and go contact someone you have been wanting to say hello to or re connect with I know I am.
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10-23-2017, 02:03 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Kootenays, BC
Posts: 46
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Timely thread...
My neighbour, whom I've had the privilege of getting to know reasonably well for the past 4 years and a little bit, passed away early this morning. I hadn't had a chance to go visit him in the past couple of weeks following his recent surgery. Planned to see him in the hospital, and he checked himself out and was at home. Right there across the fence, and I didn't go visit. Now I won't have the chance. A huge loss.
Lesson learned, I'll be making more of an effort and reaching out to a number of others whom I've lost contact with over the years. Life is too short to spend it chasing dollars all the time. I find that, particularly in this province, there is far too much time spent chasing "the American dream". My wife and I have been making conscious efforts to try to change this mentality in our family and are trying to simplify as a result. Less time commuting/working, more time spent with one-another and those that mean the most to us.
Take care everyone...
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04-10-2018, 10:09 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,067
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Hated to resurrect this thread, but yesterday we said final goodbyes to a 63 year old farmer with no apparent health problems. He was our Firechiefs' Dad. It was very shocking and sobering, and made me think of this thread.
Also my Wife's Dad is going to be gone very soon as well. We are doing what we can to make him and his wife as comfortable as possible, while we and they are able.
If you haven't, phone or go visit old ..................... before it's too late.
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Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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04-10-2018, 11:03 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 2,072
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Thanks Ken. When I first read this thread it got me thinking about things.
Since then I have called a few people I hadn't talked to in years due to life being too busy.
I have also cleared the air with a couple of family members who I had been having a "feud" with for years. It wasn't over anything major but we had lost touch. I was fine with not talking to them but this got me thinking, if they were to die I would feel bad for never making an effort. At least now, of nothing else our last words weren't bitter ones.
There is a few people I want to call or stop in to see but some of them were old boys 10 years ago. There is one old farmer who's place I drive by all the time. He helped me out big time in '08 when my rig was shut down by giving me work building fence and welding for him. He didn't really need a lot of work done but he knew my situation and he found lots for me to do. He paid me well and always made sure to come get me for a hot meal at the house before I went home. I always want to stop in there but I don't know anyone around his place and I don't want to stop in to have his wife tell me he's passed away.
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04-10-2018, 11:34 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: central Alberta
Posts: 12,630
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The older we get the more we see those around us going ahead to light the way.
I spoke to a lady who was 105 at the time and she said it was the loneliest time of her life. All her friends, siblings and children had gone before her. She passed at 106. An aunt of mine was 95 and starting to get tired. I was able to spend time with her regularly until she passed at 97. Both she and I were grateful for those times.
Make time and take time for our elders. The older we get the fewer elders there are. And in time you are the eldest....
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"We all grow up with the weight of history on us. Our ancestors dwell in the attics of our brains as they do in the spiraling chains of knowledge hidden in every cell of our bodies." Shirley Abbott
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This country was started by voyagers whose young lives were swept away by the currents of the rivers for ten cents a day... just for the vanity of the European's beaver hats. ~ Red Bullets
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It is when you walk alone in nature that you discover your strengths and weaknesses. ~ Red Bullets
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04-11-2018, 08:22 AM
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 827
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ken07AOVette
Has anyone given old ......... a call?
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For last 15 years, I call my parents daily. I used to travel the world and call them daily Skype to phone. Three years ago dad has had a hart attack and small stroke after that. I visit them 18 km away every day for few hours, do whatever they need. I do not touch even a beer to be able to drive over there if they need me. Thanks, my wife understands it.
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04-11-2018, 09:32 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Edmonton Alberta
Posts: 9,886
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I am selective
I have relatives that I hardly talk to
I have childhood friends that I text every day
The rest I see in person a lot
I do not visit or socialize due to some feeling of duty. I don’t possess that feeling
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04-11-2018, 10:34 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,067
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A 24 year old girl from my daughter's class passed today, hardly had a chance to start her own life.
Death does not care about age.
__________________
Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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04-11-2018, 10:41 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: The Bush
Posts: 2,803
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Quote:
Originally Posted by huntinstuff
I am selective
I have relatives that I hardly talk to
I have childhood friends that I text every day
The rest I see in person a lot
I do not visit or socialize due to some feeling of duty. I don’t possess that feeling
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Same here
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04-11-2018, 10:45 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: central Alberta
Posts: 12,630
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ken07AOVette
A 24 year old girl from my daughter's class passed today, hardly had a chance to start her own life.
Death does not care about age.
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Sad to hear of your daughter's classmate. You are right that death comes for all ages. We need to make time for all people. Not just the elderly.
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This country was started by voyagers whose young lives were swept away by the currents of the rivers for ten cents a day... just for the vanity of the European's beaver hats. ~ Red Bullets
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It is when you walk alone in nature that you discover your strengths and weaknesses. ~ Red Bullets
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