Go Back   Alberta Outdoorsmen Forum > Main Category > General Discussion

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 05-30-2011, 06:09 PM
Boss442's Avatar
Boss442 Boss442 is offline
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 444
Default Best joke I've heard in a while!!

A woman married three times walked into a bridal shop one day and told the sales clerk that she was looking for a wedding gown for her fourth wedding. "Of course, madam," replied the sales clerk, "exactly what type and color dress are you looking for?

The bride to be said; "A long frilly white dress with a veil."

The sales clerk hesitated a bit, then said, "Please don't take this the wrong way, but gowns of that nature are considered more appropriate for brides who are being married the first time - for those who are a bit more innocent, if you know what I mean. Perhaps ivory or sky blue would be nice?"

"Well," replied the customer, a little peeved at the clerk's directness, "I can assure you that a white gown would be quite appropriate. Believe it or not, despite all my marriages, I remain as innocent as a first-time bride. You see, my first husband was so excited about our wedding; he died as we were checking into our hotel.

My second husband and I got into such a terrible fight in the limo on our way to our honeymoon that we had that wedding annulled immediately and never spoke to each other again."

What about your third husband?" asked the sales clerk.

That one was a Progressive Conservative," said the woman, "and every night for four years, he just sat on the edge of the bed and told me how good it was going to be, but nothing ever happened."
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 05-30-2011, 08:11 PM
300savage 300savage is online now
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Spruce Grove, Alberta
Posts: 303
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Boss442 View Post
A woman married three times walked into a bridal shop one day and told the sales clerk that she was looking for a wedding gown for her fourth wedding. "Of course, madam," replied the sales clerk, "exactly what type and color dress are you looking for?

The bride to be said; "A long frilly white dress with a veil."

The sales clerk hesitated a bit, then said, "Please don't take this the wrong way, but gowns of that nature are considered more appropriate for brides who are being married the first time - for those who are a bit more innocent, if you know what I mean. Perhaps ivory or sky blue would be nice?"

"Well," replied the customer, a little peeved at the clerk's directness, "I can assure you that a white gown would be quite appropriate. Believe it or not, despite all my marriages, I remain as innocent as a first-time bride. You see, my first husband was so excited about our wedding; he died as we were checking into our hotel.

My second husband and I got into such a terrible fight in the limo on our way to our honeymoon that we had that wedding annulled immediately and never spoke to each other again."

What about your third husband?" asked the sales clerk.

That one was a LIBERAL," said the woman, "and every night for four years, he just sat on the edge of the bed and told me how good it was going to be, but nothing ever happened."


Fixed it for ya
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 05-30-2011, 09:03 PM
rugatika rugatika is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 17,790
Default thanks...

I didn't get the first version at all. That second version...now that is hilarious.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 05-30-2011, 09:42 PM
FlyFishFairwx FlyFishFairwx is offline
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Calgary Alberta
Posts: 114
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by rugatika View Post
I didn't get the first version at all. That second version...now that is hilarious.
X1
__________________
As in the army I have never had a bad day fly fishing,or Hunting some damn uncomfortable ones but never a bad one.
Everybody must believe in something, I believe in fly fishing and fly tying, hunting and believe I will
A member of the order of the Odonata
Vice-President of Project Healing Waters & Fly fishing Canada
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 05-30-2011, 10:26 PM
bobalong bobalong is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 4,130
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Boss442 View Post
A woman married three times walked into a bridal shop one day and told the sales clerk that she was looking for a wedding gown for her fourth wedding. "Of course, madam," replied the sales clerk, "exactly what type and color dress are you looking for?

The bride to be said; "A long frilly white dress with a veil."

The sales clerk hesitated a bit, then said, "Please don't take this the wrong way, but gowns of that nature are considered more appropriate for brides who are being married the first time - for those who are a bit more innocent, if you know what I mean. Perhaps ivory or sky blue would be nice?"

"Well," replied the customer, a little peeved at the clerk's directness, "I can assure you that a white gown would be quite appropriate. Believe it or not, despite all my marriages, I remain as innocent as a first-time bride. You see, my first husband was so excited about our wedding; he died as we were checking into our hotel.

My second husband and I got into such a terrible fight in the limo on our way to our honeymoon that we had that wedding annulled immediately and never spoke to each other again."

What about your third husband?" asked the sales clerk.

That one was a Progressive Conservative," said the woman, "and every night for four years, he just sat on the edge of the bed and told me how good it was going to be, but nothing ever happened."
They are a joke for sure
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 05-30-2011, 10:31 PM
outdoors forever outdoors forever is offline
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: High Prairie, Alberta
Posts: 2,501
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by bobalong View Post
They are a joke for sure
Are you sure you're saying this on the right forum?????
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 05-31-2011, 02:16 AM
NoKlu NoKlu is offline
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,194
Default

Good joke. As usual ,a liberal comment with no basis in fact. With the LIEbrals not there to block everything the CON's try to do, things will change. 2 days until our hidden agenda is released to the world and all the LIEb's can do is sit back,shut up and watch.
__________________
"The most important rule in a gunfight is: Always win and cheat if necessary".
If you find yourself in a fair fight your tactics suck.
Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 06:09 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.