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01-22-2020, 09:16 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Westerose
Posts: 4,079
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Things that spouses say
We have things that parents say covered in another thread, so I thought I would start one for spouses.
Mrs ARG and I are watching TV, completely out of the blue she says, "I'm really pleased with how my poodles turned out." I'm thinking, "Poodles? What poodles?" Awkward silence as I try to think of a response.
ARG
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In the immortal words of Jean Paul Sartre, 'Au revoir, gopher'.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sjemac
It has been scientifically proven that a 308 round will not leave your property -- they essentially fall dead at the fence line. But a 38 round, when fired from a handgun, will of its own accord leave your property and destroy any small schools nearby.
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01-22-2020, 09:33 AM
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,721
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"It's in the box under"
I don't know if I ever found it
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01-22-2020, 09:35 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Edmonton area
Posts: 1,467
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Wife--"Are you even listening to me?"
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Wherever you go, there you are
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01-22-2020, 09:38 AM
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 5,168
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Her, out of nowhere “Talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk...talk talk?”
Me, looking up from 6 different maps and harvest data, planning the next hunt - “huh?”
Her:
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“Nothing is more persistent than a liberal with a dumb idea” - Ebrand
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01-22-2020, 09:42 AM
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Join Date: May 2014
Location: SJ, NB
Posts: 410
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I once said to my wife one time as she was driving ..... "Honey, you know if they put all those potholes in a straight line, you wouldn't have to swerve to hit them."
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"The majority is never right."
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01-22-2020, 09:42 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Okotoks, AB
Posts: 532
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If you get a shower first
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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01-22-2020, 10:10 AM
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Calgary
Posts: 19,420
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I hear "I love you anyways.." frequently
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"The trouble with people idiot-proofing things, is the resulting evolution of the idiot." Me
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01-22-2020, 10:12 AM
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AO Sponsor
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Airdrie, AB and Part Time BC
Posts: 3,014
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Urban Expressions Wheel & Tire Inc
Bay #6, 1303 44th ave NE
Calgary AB, T2E6L5
403.769.1771
bobbybirds@icloud.com
www.urbanexp.ca
Leviticus 23: 4-18: "he that scopeth a lever, or thou allow a scope to lie with a lever as it would lie with a bolt action, shall have created an abomination and shall perish in the fires of Hell forever and ever.....plus GST" - huntinstuff April 07/23
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01-22-2020, 10:20 AM
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: GRAND PRAIRIE
Posts: 5,720
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tirebob
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Classic
Sent from my SM-G930W8 using Tapatalk
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01-22-2020, 10:22 AM
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 8,338
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Why are you using that towel!
BW
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01-22-2020, 10:11 AM
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: GRAND PRAIRIE
Posts: 5,720
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I'm quite lucky my wife's always says when are you going back to work or when are you going fishing
Sent from my SM-G930W8 using Tapatalk
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01-22-2020, 11:38 AM
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Moderator
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: A bit North o' Center...
Posts: 11,161
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“Something really stinks in here...”
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01-22-2020, 11:48 AM
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 8,338
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All I do around here is clean!
BW
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01-22-2020, 12:06 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Lloydminster
Posts: 4,518
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Wife always say " you never listen to me......" at least that's what I think she said
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The problem we have today is that the people who work for a living are outnumbered by the people who vote for a living.
We were all born ignorant but one must work very hard to remain that way.
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01-22-2020, 12:39 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 2,999
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Her:"Why can't you be more sensitive!?!?" ?(for the 100th time)
Me: "OK"....then do a wimpering whining Woody Allen impression.
Her: "Ugghh...get away from me, you're creeping me out."
Me: "Which would you like?"
Her: "Hmmmp"
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01-22-2020, 12:51 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ft. McMurray and Kingston
Posts: 1,764
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My wife - often! "Hun, my car needs gas." (She passes at least 2 gas stations on her way back and forth from work.)
Me, "How low is it?"
She, "I don't know. The red light came on a few days ago."
Me, " "
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01-22-2020, 02:54 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: At the end of the Thirsty Beaver Trail, Pinsky lake, Alberta.
Posts: 24,620
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pull my finger...
If your getting up...get me a beer.
Dam I like when you vacuum under the couch on all fours
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Be careful when you follow the masses, sometimes the "M" is silent...
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01-22-2020, 03:02 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,071
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 58thecat
pull my finger...
If your getting up...get me a beer.
Dam I like when you vacuum under the couch on all fours
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Your spouse says those to you?
I thought you were a guy!
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Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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01-22-2020, 03:08 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 292
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Are you deaf??
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01-22-2020, 03:16 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 840
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Things my wife says to me
You never heard a word I said.
You stink, did you not shower on your last 8 day hunting trip?
You overcooked my steak. I wanted it rare.
WHEN are you going hunting, fishing, again?
Did you **** yourself?
DID something crawl up your ass and die?
You drive like an old man in a mini van.
Tell me why you need another gun? You have 3 safes full of them.
Don’t come home with out a moose!
Can you put gas in my car? And by the way it could use a wash.
Your having another beer? I think you have had way too many.
Do not come near me unless that grey **** gets removed from your face.
She is one of a kind and I love her dearly.
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01-22-2020, 03:16 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: central Alberta
Posts: 12,629
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 58thecat
pull my finger...
If your getting up...get me a beer.
Dam I like when you vacuum under the couch on all fours
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ken07AOVette
Your spouse says those to you?
I thought you were a guy!
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His wife is the one with the beard.
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This country was started by voyagers whose young lives were swept away by the currents of the rivers for ten cents a day... just for the vanity of the European's beaver hats. ~ Red Bullets
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It is when you walk alone in nature that you discover your strengths and weaknesses. ~ Red Bullets
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01-22-2020, 03:20 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: central Alberta
Posts: 12,629
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When I told my ex I was going fishing one day she retorted back... "You just want to go have fun!"
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___________________________________________
This country was started by voyagers whose young lives were swept away by the currents of the rivers for ten cents a day... just for the vanity of the European's beaver hats. ~ Red Bullets
___________________________________________
It is when you walk alone in nature that you discover your strengths and weaknesses. ~ Red Bullets
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01-22-2020, 05:33 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: At the end of the Thirsty Beaver Trail, Pinsky lake, Alberta.
Posts: 24,620
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Red Bullets
His wife is the one with the beard.
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what's a spouse?
do you need a tag for them...is there a season?
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Be careful when you follow the masses, sometimes the "M" is silent...
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01-22-2020, 05:37 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Westerose
Posts: 4,079
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 58thecat
what's a spouse?
do you need a tag for them...is there a season?
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A person could get in trouble using the term 'bag limit' in this context.
ARG
__________________
In the immortal words of Jean Paul Sartre, 'Au revoir, gopher'.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sjemac
It has been scientifically proven that a 308 round will not leave your property -- they essentially fall dead at the fence line. But a 38 round, when fired from a handgun, will of its own accord leave your property and destroy any small schools nearby.
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01-22-2020, 03:44 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Edmonton Alberta
Posts: 9,620
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"Have you seen my Visa?" (Yup....lots)
"Just chill!"
"I think its rum time for you"
"I'll be back Thursday. Try to behave"
"That quad!!! Get a new one for gods sake. Its embarassing"
"You dead?"
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01-22-2020, 03:48 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,071
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Every time I go fishing.
'don't catch any feeesh!'
__________________
Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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01-22-2020, 03:49 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 8,497
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Not something she said exactly-But the only time I ever heard my ex-wife laugh in 30 years was when /if I badly hurt/cut myself.
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You're only as good as your last haircut
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01-22-2020, 03:54 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Near YVR
Posts: 1,237
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I used to get 99% Sound and 1% advice.
Nice and quiet now...........
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We sleep safe in our beds because rough men & women stand ready in the day/night to visit violence on those who would do us harm.
RIP Pte Terry J Street 2nd Battalion, PPCLI, Shilo, Man. EOT, April 4 2008 Panjwayi District Afghanistan,Constable Jimmy Ng,RCMP EOW,Sunday, September 15, 2002
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01-22-2020, 03:59 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,071
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Quote:
Originally Posted by .257Weatherby
I used to get 99% Sound and 1% advice.
Nice and quiet now...........
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If you mean you moved on, that was a very good 1200th post.
__________________
Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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01-22-2020, 04:35 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 9,677
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No one admits to Go eff yourself I can't be the only one when wifey is .
Mine likes to tell me the same thing at least twice if it is about something that needs to be done or coming up. Then wonders why i'm looking at her like that on the 3rd explanation.
I also get the something is wrong with the car speech, weeks after the noise started.
Giving directions, I don't want your hand drawn map(easy as google). Let me write it out like I need to do it so I know as I go. 20 mins later I am still explaining to turn left here, turn at that street there and you will see your destination.
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