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01-17-2020, 06:10 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,071
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Waste not want not; and other favorite quotes from your parents
you start, put up your favorite quotes.
(The grand parent ones are the best )
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Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought..... 
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01-17-2020, 06:25 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 8,315
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Close the door, you weren’t born in a barn!
BW
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01-17-2020, 06:28 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Calgary
Posts: 746
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Marry in haste and repent at leisure!
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01-17-2020, 06:30 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: On the border in Lloydminster
Posts: 8,364
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I had no shoes and complained until I met a man with no feet.
???? to a twelve year old wanting new Adidas
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01-17-2020, 06:37 PM
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 851
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You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but don’t wipe your friends on the carpet
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01-17-2020, 06:47 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Black Dually
Posts: 259
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Dad sayings
Everybody gets 24 hours in the day.
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01-17-2020, 06:49 PM
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Red Deer
Posts: 1,531
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If you can’t buy it with cash, you don’t deserve it.
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01-17-2020, 06:50 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,071
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'YOU wanted it, YOU eat it'
Liver. Just once. One half bite and I was full.
__________________
Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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01-17-2020, 06:52 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,071
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Wife's Dad's favorite;
'I'm gonna kick your ass so far between your shoulders you're gonna have to part your hair to take a chit'
__________________
Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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01-17-2020, 06:53 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 2,931
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Don't write checks your body can't cash.
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01-17-2020, 06:54 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: GP
Posts: 950
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It's hard to soar with the eagles; when you work with a bunch of turkeys.
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01-17-2020, 06:55 PM
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Dreadful Valley
Posts: 14,620
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He couldn’t find his arse using a map, mirror, and written directions.
One of my dads favourites.
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There are no absolutes
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01-17-2020, 07:00 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: McBride/Prince George
Posts: 14,579
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“Boy...... you’re cruisin for a bruisin!!!!”
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01-17-2020, 07:02 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: calgary ab
Posts: 2,703
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He don't know if his azz was punched, bored or drilled.
Had to walk to school up hill both ways in a snow storm against the wind. So stop complaining the bus isn't on time 
Good thread 
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01-17-2020, 07:07 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 2,938
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you don't get the something for the nothing
You want the something then you have to work for it
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01-17-2020, 07:09 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: calgary ab
Posts: 2,703
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From my lady: Children should be seen and not heard,
Useless as teats on a boar.
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01-17-2020, 07:12 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 598
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We the willing
Led by the unknowing
Are doing the impossible
For the ungrateful
We have done it for so long
With so little
That we are now qualified
To do anything
With Nothing
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01-17-2020, 07:17 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 8,494
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My Dad
I like to go swimmin with bow legged women and dive between their legs
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You're only as good as your last haircut
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01-17-2020, 07:19 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: calgary ab
Posts: 2,703
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What about the ones the kids came up with???
Cuzz if
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01-17-2020, 07:21 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 318
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Great Grampa (passed down by my mom)
Your up and down like a fart on a curtain pole.
Your eyes are redder than than two eagles arses in a power dive.
Sent from my SM-A520W using Tapatalk
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01-17-2020, 07:22 PM
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 247
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You wait till your father get's home !!
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let em fly watch em die
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01-17-2020, 07:24 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 8,315
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MR.K
You wait till your father get's home !!
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Never answer this question with a why? Still have the scar from her backhand, wedding rings hurt!
BW
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01-17-2020, 07:36 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 689
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My favourite is “wrong information is worse than none at all”
That one makes for some good laughs if someone in the family makes a mistake. 
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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01-17-2020, 07:37 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 416
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"If you turn them upside down they all look like sisters."
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01-17-2020, 07:41 PM
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Banned
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: YEG
Posts: 9,981
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DAD: Do you NEED it or just WANT it 
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01-17-2020, 07:58 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 11,357
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One from my Uncle, "poor people can't afford cheap stuff". It took a few years for me to get that.
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“One of the sad signs of our times is that we have demonized those who produce, subsidized those who refuse to produce, and canonized those who complain.”
Thomas Sowell
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01-17-2020, 08:01 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 679
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Useful as a saddle on a sow.
If you want sympathy its between Sh_t and syphilis in the dictionary.
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01-17-2020, 08:02 PM
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AO Sponsor
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Airdrie, AB and Part Time BC
Posts: 3,003
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“The chit apple doesn’t fall far from the chit tree” Oh... Wait... That was Mr. Jim Lahey!
__________________
Urban Expressions Wheel & Tire Inc
Bay #6, 1303 44th ave NE
Calgary AB, T2E6L5
403.769.1771
bobbybirds@icloud.com
www.urbanexp.ca
Leviticus 23: 4-18: "he that scopeth a lever, or thou allow a scope to lie with a lever as it would lie with a bolt action, shall have created an abomination and shall perish in the fires of Hell forever and ever.....plus GST" - huntinstuff April 07/23
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01-17-2020, 08:04 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 940
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My dad always said “what’s wrong you can’t sit still you’re like a fart in a shoebox. “
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01-17-2020, 08:13 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: calgary ab
Posts: 2,703
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Why don't you go outside and play!!! My Ma 1960:
Two more siblings born two years later 
Gonna wash your mouth out with soap. Ma again: Pretty cool blowing bubbles out the butt hole and I never had a dirty mouth again till I got to high school
Last edited by barbless; 01-17-2020 at 08:16 PM.
Reason: Forgot something
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