Seasonal depression

[MrMister12]

Hi boys and girls, I hope everyone had a good Christmas and is ready for the new year.

I’m just wondering if anyone else here goes through extreme depression this time of year. And how do you deal with it? I’m single, and have been for way too long, and this time of year is just brutal on my mind. I want to be happy, but to be honest, seeing happy people just makes it worse. I’m not looking for sympathy, just suggestions on how to alleviate the depression to a bearable level. I’ve basically stopped doing most of the activities I like doing, mainly because I just don’t find them as entertaining when doing them alone. I’m not a very social person, so meeting friends isn’t easy.

Bah, that’s enough whining.

Thanks
Matt

[huntinstuff]

Matt
How old are you and where do you live

Knowing that will help us help you

[Scott N]

Best thing you could do is talk to your doctor about your options.

[MrMister12]

My bad. I’m 35 and live east of Sherwood Park. Strathcona County.

[Flatlandliver]

Originally Posted by scott n

best thing you could do is talk to your doctor about your options.

x1000
Just having the stones to make the post is a very good sign. Seeking professional help is nothing to be afraid or ashamed of.

[MrMister12]

I appreciate the suggestion to see a doctor, but I haven’t been to a doctor in 15 years. And when I brought it up back then they just gave me drugs, which made things so much worse. And after telling them it made it worse they just upped the dosage. So I don’t trust doctors anymore.

[ssyd]

Originally Posted by MrMister12

I appreciate the suggestion to see a doctor, but I haven’t been to a doctor in 15 years. And when I brought it up back then they just gave me drugs, which made things so much worse. And after telling them it made it worse they just upped the dosage. So I don’t trust doctors anymore.

My doctor gave me a choice: Drugs or counseling. That's basically what your options are. Not sure if you could go to counseling without a referral but if you did need one you could get a medi-centre doctor to write one up.

My doctor ended up giving me Welbutrin instead of some zombifying anti-depressant. Helps me get out of bed in the morning and as a bonus if you wanna quit smoking, that's what it was originally developed for.

As for a doctor, you'll never find a good one if you never try. Mine's hours are TERRIBLE but I trust his opinion and trust him not to just push pills. I had the same opinion of doctors as you.

[MooseRiverTrapper]

Exercise. Start playing shinny. Go to gym. Get a sweat on.

[sarahfaye]

Make sure our vitamin D levels are not low. Most are. I take 6000mg a day.
Good luck and Happy New Year

[58thecat]

Originally Posted by MooseRiverTrapper

Exercise. Start playing shinny. Go to gym. Get a sweat on.

This here is my escape, giv'er hard, the body needs to get the blood flowing, cleanses the soul. You would be surprised if you go to a work out class etc just how good it will do you. Oh and you might meet someone too.

[Flatlandliver]

Originally Posted by 58thecat

This here is my escape, giv'er hard, the body needs to get the blood flowing, cleanses the soul. You would be surprised if you go to a work out class etc just how good it will do you. Oh and you might meet someone too.

It’s good advise but it’s temporary and won’t address deep seated issues. Way better then hitting a bottle or the casino for sure but it sounds to me like our young friend could benefit from quality professional care.

[TomP]

I live in an extremely rainy area and while my seasonal moods are not extreme they are very noticeable. As someone mentioned I take vitamin D daily. Excercise helpsa tonne

[Flatlandliver]

Originally Posted by MrMister12

I appreciate the suggestion to see a doctor, but I haven’t been to a doctor in 15 years. And when I brought it up back then they just gave me drugs, which made things so much worse. And after telling them it made it worse they just upped the dosage. So I don’t trust doctors anymore.

You may (I hope) find that Doctors will treat your concerns much differently as a 35 y/o then they did as a 20 y/o.

[MrMister12]

Thanks everyone, I appreciate all the input. Nice to have some positive reinforcement.

[buckbrush]

Originally Posted by MooseRiverTrapper

Exercise. Start playing shinny. Go to gym. Get a sweat on.

Easy to say but tough to do when you are already in a low spot. Very true though. Do what ever you can to get moving even if you have to reluctantly talk yourself into it. Trust me it will be worth it and will become easier the more you do.

Counseling is a good idea, might help you find underlying issues you hadn't considered. Making treatment actually work.

Like already stated, you have made a HUGE first step just identifying and making this thread. It took me years of denial and fear of being judged to understand something was wrong.

Looking into the vitamins also would be a good idea, we are all lacking something and its amazing how much it can change ones mood.

Best wishes, it will get better.

[pinelakeperch]

Stay busy, and always have something to look forward to. Plan a trip every week or two. It doesn't have to be big, maybe just a new lake that you haven't fished before or something. Having something to look forward to makes a big difference for me.

[MrMister12]

I’ve tried trips, and making plans. I just don’t find things fun to do alone anymore. But I’ve been doing EVERYTHING alone for more than a decade, which has more or less taken away the joy I used to get doing them.

[Smoky buck]

Get involved with a club or organization that will put you in contact with people you share a common interest with. This could possibly lead you to find people to join you in activities you enjoyed in the past

Plus you never know you may find a hot chick and get lucky lol

Put yourself out there and find things you enjoy

[Flatlandliver]

Originally Posted by MrMister12

I’ve tried trips, and making plans. I just don’t find things fun to do alone anymore. But I’ve been doing EVERYTHING alone for more than a decade, which has more or less taken away the joy I used to get doing them.

There is a big difference in being alone and being lonely. Be careful about just taking someone along for the ride without sorting your “stuff” out. Get yourself heathy in body and spirit and I bet you won’t be alone or lonely for long.

[pinelakeperch]

Originally Posted by MrMister12

I’ve tried trips, and making plans. I just don’t find things fun to do alone anymore. But I’ve been doing EVERYTHING alone for more than a decade, which has more or less taken away the joy I used to get doing them.

Sounds like it's time to step outside of your comfort zone, which is far easier said than done.

Try dating apps, friend apps, reach out to someone in the forum to fish or hunt together. By the sounds of it, those things likely will make you feel uncomfortable, but you might want to consider that remaining uncomfortable doing those things hasn't improved your situation. It might just take doing something that you don't necessarily want to do, or don't feel comfortable doing. That way of living doesn't sound to be working for you. Good luck!

Just an idea

[Purple Farmer]

Matt,

Congratulations on posting this, it is a great step in the right direction.

As others have said please talk to your doctor and go from there.

A very Happy new year to you Matt.

[Dewey Cox]

I think you just have to put yourself put there and into social settings.
I'm about the same age as you, and if I didn't trick my wife into marrying me 12 years ago I'd be in the same boat.
I imagine most of your friends have families now, and your lives aren't compatable anymore. So you'll have to find new friends, and that sounds like a lot of hard work to me.
Try curling. I think most rinks will have a learn to curl class, and they usually have a sign up for people without a team.
When the weather gets nicer, try shooting trap.
Churches have alot of social events, if you're in to that scene.
Get involved with a political campaign. That should get you around people especially in this coming year.
Most of the bachelors I know that are my age and older just run out of single friends to hang out with, and kind of turn into hermits a little bit.
Just get out there and meet new people. It will be uncomfortable and more work that just staying at home, but it will pay off I think.

[bloopbloob]

Hi Matt. Just posting this here is a big step.

I suffer from depression as well. I also hate going to doctors. Telling someone who hates going to doctors to go see a doctor, isn't going to work for most, at least not at first. Feel free to talk it out on here, with some like-minded individuals. It's a great group (for the most part, haha). I am anti-social, hate big crowds and groups, but get some social interaction by posting on this site. It's somewhat of an outlet for my social ineptitude

What do you do for work?

[Ken07AOVette]

Sounds like you have broomed the toxicity in your life, which is good
Now, you need to make some friends.
AO used to be a wonderful place for meeting people, and there are still little groups that meet all the time. I think the boys may still be doing Wingsday which is a lot of fun. I would go more but the 7 hour roundtrip makes it pretty much nil for me.
We used to have impromptu meet and greets, hang out at wholesale sports or Bass Pro, wander around the trade shows together. I have met some amazing people because of this site.

What are your hobbies? If you happen to name something that a member has similar interests in, it could lead to lifelong friendships.

There are a lot of lonely people in the forums Matt. There shouldn't be, but someone has to make the first move. You have done that, now maybe you can make some contacts.

What are your interests?

[jdwilson]

As others have said, exercise may not solve your issue completely, but it will hopefully help a little, and certainly wont hurt.

https://www.runsociety.com/health-in...ing-the-truth/

Also, do you listen to podcasts? I find myself moving alot because of work and am a little anti-social, which equals someone with not alot of personal connections. I found just listening to podcasts (JRE, Jocko, Skeptic tank, etc) makes me feel like I am part of a "community" in a way. Maybe kind of weird to hear, but it works for me.

[ditch donkey]

Get off the computer!!!!!!!!

Facebook, Twitter, this site, everything else!

People mainly post all of their life’s positives, which is fine, but that’s all you see. And it leaves a person wondering why their life isn’t as awesome as everyone else. But everyone’s life has some aspect of garbage.

That’s advice that was given to me, and it’s some of the best advice I’ve been given.

Usually in early December my wife tells me it’s time to take a vitamin d supplement.

Go for a run. It’s good for your brain. Probably your body too. If you’re too fat to run, like me, run for 1 block, walk for 2.

Talk to everyone! Old guy at the grocery store, 6 year old in line at Tim’s, men, ladies, everyone! Some don’t want to talk. That’s ok. Try understand why, use that to make your next chat better.

[RavYak]

PM sent but just wanted to say there is some other good information posted here and expand on some of it.

This sounds a lot more like regular depression than seasonal depression. The seasonal aspect is just what is tipping you over the edge.

For anyone else reading this thread going through similar issues there is a good book called Breaking the Patterns of Depression by Michael D. Yapko that has helped me figure a couple things out. As it hints we are meant to be social creatures and a big part of depression is usually due to struggling to meet personal expectations/goals. Based on what you have said so far it sounds like you need to try and get more socially active and try to find some more meaning in your life.

Don't write off medication. It isn't an end all cure but it can help in tough times and there are links between low serotonin and depression they just aren't sure which causes which(probably can happen either way). If your doctor doesn't seem helpful then trying to find a better one might be key, there are different types of medications not all of them work the exact same way and some have different side effects etc. There are also other diseases which can cause depression like symptoms so definitely should get blood tests and a physical done if you haven't done that in a while.

Counselling of course is helpful too. If you can find a good counsellor and you tell them everything then they can and will help you out.

[1899b]

If it’s regular depression you may be dealing with I urge you to get your testosterone levels checked. Also get a dose of ultraviolet lights (tanning bed) every once in awhile. The lack of sun during our winters can be a real killer...

[MrMister12]

Wow, thank you all so much for the support. I must be pretty broken, I’m a bit choked up by all the positive feedback lol thank you.

I work on a cattle:grain farm, been doing this for 15 years now. Love the job, and the family I work with. Not always a fan of the hours.

Hobbies are anything outside, hiking, fishing, quadding, hunting, shooting, archery...inside stuff I reload, tie flys

[1899b]

If it’s regular depression you may be dealing with I urge you to get your testosterone levels checked. Also get a dose of ultraviolet lights (tanning bed) every once in awhile. The lack of light during our winters can be a real killer...[