So long as the child is supervised by a license holder, he is free to shoot. The supervision must be close enough to be able to take control if needed.
As for the ex, don't tell her. don't talk to her about it. Do not argue about it. Just do it. If it is that big of a deal, she will take action, and you will be able to go to court and show that she is being petty, and it will cost her. If she wants, she can also send the jerks from Child and Family Services over. You can also send them packing, as there is nothing wrong with teaching a child proper firearm safety.
I've been down this same road with my ex. Funny thing was she claimed early on that she needed to have sole custody of the kids to "teach them about their native culture" In court the judge chastised her for being petty, and now I have custody of my kids, and she gets to visit them on weekends.
My son is 9, and he has a .22, and I just bought him a hunting rifle to practice with for when he is old enough to hunt. He is a crack shot, and even is handy with a pistol. He has been hunting with me for the past 2 years, and is a great tracker, and is good at dressing grouse. He likes to help out skinning and gutting the animals, and looks forward to the early mornings. Hunting season is a great time for us, and like sleephunter said, your boy will remember the time spent with his grandfather for the rest of his life.
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