Has anyone ever gone through an uncontested divorce?
 

Wondering if anyone has experience going through an uncontested divorce? The kind where you both agree on everything and just have the paperwork filed and bam its done Just wonder what your experiences were using this method.......asking for a friend. :)

Sooner you/they get a signed separation agreement the better. Emotions and lawyers get their hand in there and everything will change in a hurry. Even if uncontested the divorce will take time as our court system is very slow.

Yes I did, about 20 years ago. We were young at the time, no kids/property and very few mutual assets. I retained a lawyer and had the paperwork drawn up, the papers were served, signed by her and it was a done deal. Elapsed time was less than a year. I think that the total cost was under $1000 for me at that time (minus all of the material stuff I left behind), so we didn't put any lawyers' kids through university. Didn't bother with drawing up a legal separation, as I was advised by my lawyer that it wasn't worth the money it was printed on.

Worked out well for both of us, as it was done before we truly resented and hated each other. She re-married about a year later, i did the same 5 years after that. Would still probably be able to have a good conversation if we bumped into one another.

You will each have to hire your own lawyer and triple dog agree with your ex not to fall for promises from her lawyer that he can get her more out of you.... and you dont fall for your lawyer's statement that he can offer you more protection! DAMHIK

More hurdles you can put in the way of them changing their mind the better. Costs them a pile of money if they decide to fight it. You can get a divorce without a separation of assets but you leave yourself wide open for 2 years after the divorce is granted.
Cannot get a divorce until you have been separated for a year. A lot can change in a year.

I did 15 years ago. Sold everything did the 50/50 signed divorce papers and we both sailed off into the sunset. That being said I knew her from childhood, we both from the same small town, and our families know each other. One screwing the other over wasn’t in the books.

I chose not to contest my divorce. I believe I did the right thing, for the kids sake. But for me it meant years of misery.

It turned out that without a court settlement, I had no recourse when CPS took every last dime I was earning and left me and my son destitute one Christmas.

They also took my only means of making a living and then demanded payment if full even though I was unemployed, couldn't be employed thanks to them and was only $200 and two weeks behind.
If not for generous relatives I would have been sent to jail, not because I refused to pay but because I had no means of earning a living for me and my son, much less making payments for a child had not contact with, and not by my choice.

Yes, I took one and she took one, but I was the only one that had to pay child maintenance, because I had not contested the divorce.

The bottom line, I still believe that when children are involved a no contest divorce is the only reasonable option if at all possible. But it'll cost you big time.

Whatever your friend does, go to court, plead no contest if he wishes and he should be okay.
But never never never agree on anything outside of court. CPS will bleed him to death if there are kids involved.

Even if there are no kids involved, never underestimate the power of radial feminism in government.
Protect yourself, get a real judges signature on your divorce papers.

Without it, the radical feminists will believe everything your X says and back her every move while labeling everything you say, a lie and blocking your every move, and they have the same authority as a court.

CPS is misnamed. It should be called rabid feminism incorporated.

Like I said, we had a kid involved, verbal agreement on child support and never heard a peep from the government.
But she’s a pretty cool woman and friend.
I wouldn’t advise it but my circumstances were different than most.

First up: protect yourself - guns, money (all of it, out of any domestic bank) gear, any keepsakes you don’t want to part with in a safe place she can’t access and doesn’t know about. The royal gestapo loves stealing guns from guys going through a divorce.

Change locks on the house and vehicle, make sure it’s parked inside.

Then you can talk about lawyers and paperwork

I did in 2012, although it was in Montana. She wanted out and I decided to take the high road. As much as it sucked in the end I am WAY better off. She burnt bridges left and right trying to screw me over and taking the high road left me smelling like roses! Yes we didn't have much to our name or kids which I believe is what made it way easier. In the end it cost about 300$ for the court paperwork which she paid for. I would just make sure you make itemized lists of who gets what and if you have any retirement or savings accounts again who gets what so they can't come back at a later time and try to claim it. Sure helped that one of the court clerks was a friend who just went through a divorce right before I did and was able to help me. Without knowing the parties involved I will always recommend protecting yourself. If that includes lawyering up then do it. Small price to pay up front then to get blindsided if you have an evil soon to be ex.... If its a mutual thing trust your gut but definitely make itemized lists of who gets what etc..

We had an uncontested divorce, we actually spoke to each other, agreed on the division of assets, two children, both stayed with their mom, we agreed on a child support amount, took it to a lawyer and $600 later all done,
That was 18 years ago, the kids are young adults and we still talk to each other frequently about whatever issue the kid might be having today.
Any way you spin it she will always be the mother of your children so you best work your ***** of to make sure the relationship is as good as it can be. The kids deserve that, you just kind of swallow your pride and do what you need to do to keep things tight and going in the right direction.

I just went through a separation/divorce over the past year and a half. First off if you can both agree on division of assets and stick to it it's really quite simple. Step #1 is for each of you to find different lawyers and one of you get a separation agreement drawn up with what you have agreed upon already(cost me $1500 in Calgary). That lawyer will send it to the other spouses lawyer and go over everything with them to see if any changes are to be made. If everything is all good you both sign the agreement and you're all covered on the financial and child custody/support side of things. Once you are past 1 year of being separated you can now get a divorce (certain circumstances allow it to be done sooner).

I just got divorced a couple months ago. We filled out all the paperwork for a jointly filed divorce, left an hour early from work one day and we met at the courthouse and filed for under $300. 2 months later it was signed off by the judge and made official. I would recommend not messing around with verbal agreements for child support. When we first decided to split we agreed on each paying half of our sons daycare fees and that would be it, 1 week at my place then 1 at hers. After meeting with my lawyer he informed me that no judge will ever sign off on that for child support. You must go off the federal child support table created by our government, no if's about it. This amount is based off of each of your gross incomes for each tax year therefore it will vary every year most likely. If you do it otherwise it could come back to bite you in the ass which might be what happened to kegriver. let's say you both agree to you paying her $500 a month and you do so for 5 years. Then something happens between you two and she wants to take you for all you got. She sees a lawyer and he calculates you should have been paying her $1000 monthly so now you're stuck forking over that back pay or you're going to be losing your licence and having your wages garnished. I know quite a few people that have these verbal agreements and I'm sure it works fine for some people but you're opening yourself up to be put in a bad spot down the road. I also send all my payments by e-transfer so there is an electronic paper trail, never do this with cash.

Here are a couple calculators to give your friend an idea of what he's in for financially.

https://www.mysupportcalculator.ca/calculator/results
https://www.davidsonfraese.ca/albert...rt-calculator/

Just my 2 cents.

Wife and I did the separation back in June. It was about as amicable and uncontested as could be. We sold the house and all our shared toys and then went through the house and sold anything neither one of us wanted. I kept my guns and she kept hers (which are actually in my safe because she asked me to hold onto them for her).

We had a shared bank account for fifteen years and just split it in half. We each kept our own savings which were about equal anyway. Lawyers fees were about $1500 each.

We're still good friends and always will be. She actually came over to my new condo last week and cooked me dinner. About the only thing I lost were all our friends, who couldn't accept that it was like that. They unanimously sided with her. Not really a loss.

We might be the extreme example, but it can be done.

Good luck.

Colin

Did it about twelve years ago. After 10 years of marriage and two kids just found we were at different places.
Remember the words of my lawyer..."if either of you gets into a ****ing match the only ones who win are the lawyers" (this of course is based on neither one of us being millionaires).
Added the value of everything we owned since the marriage (house, cars etc) and split 50/50. Agreed to co-parent the kids 50/50.
She completely agreed (lucky there...if one person doesn't agree it can get ugly).
I remember I paid my lawyer a retainer of $2000.00 A year later the divorce decree came in the mail and a cheque for $127...the amount of the retain that hadn't been used.
We still talk on a weekly basis regarding the kids (now 16 and 17) who are both doing great. One apprenticing for a auto mechanics, the youngest headed for university. The boys and I spent last week making a drum with a local drum-maker for their mothers birthday in a few days.
Divorce doesn't have to be ugly.

There is no such thing when kids and assets are involved.
trust me Ive done it, it will come back to bite you in the ass later

Remember 1 thing the divorce court does not hold any weight on child support and custody of kids.
you can agree on it today and it can be changed tomorrow

SPEND THE MONEY AND SAVE YOURSELF THE HEADACHE

Tell your friend, divorces are expensive.... because they are worth it.

Not my experience in the least.
But as I said, if one of the parties decides to get nasty it all falls apart.
I have two teenagers who would totally disagree with you about the kids part...and financially I have never been better off than I am now.

Did it 5 years ago. I had a handshake deal the day I moved out that she reneged on, I stayed patient and then pressed her after 4 months. We negotiated, I had one question with a lawyer that cost me $300 and it confirmed my research. The most important thing is getting a separation agreement asap, it really is the guideline that is used for the actual divorce. You will need a lawyer to sign off on it and to ensure your rights are taken care of. I let my ex and lawyer do all the work (and most of the cost). Everything about divorce law is easily accessed online for Alberta. Also, if the soon to be ex is amiable, you can use one one of the law firms that specialize in that type of divorce.

https://www.canadianlegal.org/uncont...es-in-alberta/

If it’s not going to be contested you probably wouldn’t begetting divorced.

There’s a million stories of folks who have had a deal worked out prior and then one side gets a lawyer who says they can get them the moon. Once the gloves are off (and I hope you can avoid that), the last thing you want to do is cheap out for legal counsel.

Child support, pensions are all pretty black and white.

Possessions are just stuff, you can get more stuff, don’t sweat the small stuff if it helps with the big stuff.

What province/ city you in?

Thanks guys. I would want very little to be honest, my truck, motorcycle and tools are all i'm really interested in. Oh and my dog, dog has to come with and our kids are grown so child support wouldn't be an issue. I would be willing to walk away and give her the equity in the house to help her start over and make this painless as possible. I have contacted a place that does uncontested divorce's and got some advice from them as well. I just need to keep her sister out of her ear, she's nothing but trouble.

Just and FYI, this is a public forum....

Make sure you think about spousal support in your settlement.

Mediator was awesome. Ensured all the legal stuff, waaay cheaper than lawyers!

I really like lawyers because there is NOTHING they won't do for money.

Kind of a handy thing to know

So if you absolutely have to, use one.

I wonder: if you can obtain a completely uncontested amicable divorce, that seems pretty rare isn't it?

When I got divorced round 2000 my lawyer was just charging the crap out of me but nothing was going anywhere. Anyways I took her to taxation. It’s where a independent lawyer views the case and questions them about there charges all that stuff. She was charging me 2 bux a page for faxes he knocked it down to 25 cents. In the end she sent me a bill for 5000 dollars. The independent lawyer quashed that and I walked away. But still had to hire a new lawyer. About a year later I heard she filed for bankruptcy


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I DID!!!!! As possible a uncontested divorce as possible. All of a sudden the lawyer I had was the T's are not crossed, therefore it went back to her lawyer, who crossed the T's, and then the i where not doted, cain't have that. And then the papers would go back. I paid and she contested it and got some of her money back. My lawyer went on to be a high financal criminal lawyer, her's went to be a alright guy, OH WELL!!!! at least he could spell. Don't let the lawyer screw you around the way mine did.

Don't get married, no contest.:scared0018:

My divorce was just like that. The lawyers got ready for a fight, my wife and I left the room, made an amiable agreement, went back in and we both told our lawyers what to do. Both lawyers told each of us that we were making a big mistake, but we stuck to our guns and never regretted it. Quick, clean, fair and relatively inexpensive.

We've remained friends, initially I helped her out a little financially in educational courses to get her on her feet again and over the years we both have provided encouragement to each other and stay in touch - directly and through old mutual friends. We split almost 40 years ago and still respect each other and stay in touch. At one time, we loved each other very much, in some ways, we still do.

Perfect.
Same with me...sometimes we just make better friends than couples.